our |perfect| storm

Ok, neuro pysch eval results!!  We didn't learn much more with the nearly 10 pages of information we received. Basically, no medical professional could ever look at Troys chart and match him to what he is today. There are no words to describe this miraculous healing that has happened with him. The results began with a summary of how Troy presented in his arrival to Spectrums ED and went all the way until his current state. To try and put this all into perspective for you I've done a little research.  When a person presents with a head injury one of the many things they do is check/test a person and rank them using what's called a Glasgow Coma Scale. A Glascoma Scale gives some insight on how severe the injury is based on the patients responses to certain things; motor response, eye opening, and verbal response. It ranges from 3-15; 3 being the most severe and 15 being mild. Troy scored at a 4. Meaning he had little to no response with any kind of stimulation.  As apart of t

Occasionally I'll have a sleepless night. I have a feeling it will be one of those nights tonight so instead of harboring up all my feelings and thoughts I thought I would get it out.  Often times I'll have a hard time sleeping at night because night time is usually when I lay in bed and cannot get the images out of my head of Troy right after his accident. It's something that will probably be stuck with me for the rest of my life. I wish so badly I could erase all of them but I can't. I never understood it when people say they can see it and feel it like it was yesterday. I've never had that with anything until now. I can put myself right back where it happened, in the moment, I know exactly what I was thinking. At the time it was just me and him, there were people around but they weren't there to me. I rubbed his back frantically while I was in the biggest battle of my life in my head, contemplating what I needed to do to make it better. I remember thinking, t

I am not my struggles.  Today is a new day. My attitude is my choice and today I'm going to choose happiness. My struggles don't and shouldn't define me. I am not weak and I'm not going to let life's unfortunate events take me down.  I've felt like the last four months have presented a lot of opportunities for the devil to get into my head and unfortunately, it's happened on multiple occasions. My anxiety gets to me and overwhelms me with negative thoughts. It's a lot for me to overcome those negative thoughts. I don't want to feel bad for myself, I don't want bad things to break me. I'm so much stronger than all of that.  All of these battles I've felt like I'm fighting alone becuause Troy isn't my Troy he was before the accident. Last night was the first time we sat down, talked and I saw a glimpse of my Troy back. I can't even describe how happy I felt at that moment. I cried. Knowing that some of troys deficits might not c

I have had a really hard time updating this blog. My intention for this blog was to expand outside the box of just Troy, but let's face it; the boy is my life! I'm so OK with that. I love writing about Troy and the progress he has been making. It is honestly so fun to be able to tell people the fun stories and updates we have. This whole journey has been quite the experience. Not always great. From the beginning, I told myself I was going to be real about everything. I don't want to portray my life  or myself as perfect because it is so very far from that. I struggle with a lot things just as any one of you do. My personality is very open, honest, and opinionated. Trust me when I say, I'm well aware that those things can get me in trouble. At times, things I say can just as easily go unsaid. When Troy and I started dating I learned quickly that not all people are like me. Troy came into things with an attitude of, "get over it'. Oh my, I won't even begin

We won't have the official report for at least a week but from what the Pyschologist said, things went great today! Troy was pretty bummed he couldn't study for this but I'm actually glad he couldn't. That would have made for a lot more unnecessary stress on his end.  The Pyschologist explained that Troys processing speed is the only thing she is seeing that's a true deficit. It seems to get worse with the more tasks given to complete at a time. Depending on the task his processing deficit can range from mild to severe. This is the most common deficit that accompanies a traumatic brain injury. Processing is something that can get better over time or it could continue to be an issue. There is no way to know. Having been only four months, she seems to think there is a good chance it will get better. What she did see that she really appreciated is that Troy worked through things slower to make sure he was getting it right. Now, if you know Troy, doing anything slow is

"Come to Me for rest and refreshment. The journey has been too much for you, and you are bone-weary. Do not be ashamed of your exhaustion. Instead, see it as an opportunity for Me to take charge of your life. Remember that I can fit everything into a pattern for good, including the things you wish were different. Start with where you are at this point in time and space, accepting that this is where I intend you to be. You will get through today one step, one moment at a time. Your main responsibility is to remain attentive to Me, letting Me guide you through the many choices along your pathway. This sounds like an easy assignment, it is not. Your desire to live in My presence goes against the grain of "the world,the flesh, and the devil". Much of your weariness results from your constant battle against these opponents. However, you are on the path of My choosing, so do not give up! Hope in Me, for you will again praise Me with the help of My presence."  Jesus Callin

I'm so excited to say, the results are in and Troys tremors/twitching is NOT  in any way related to seizures! Were so thrilled with the news that not only do we not need to worry about seizures but that Troy still has his freedom to drive.  It's been a constant struggle between the two of us while driving lately. This would be so much easier if there wasn't ice and snow everywhere! I open my opioniated mouth too much and Troy gets seriously annoyed with it. I trust him but sometimes he feels the need to look around and not pay attention to the road and I find my self clinging to the seat with the death grip yelling, "get back on the road!!". He has gotten a lot better but I'm not sure I'm ready for him to just take off on his own yet. When I got up this morning Troy was grinning from ear to ear. I knew right away he was up to no good. He had called our insurance company and added his truck back onto the insurance. Giving him a vehicle at his disposal 24/7.

It's been a while since I've posted. Life just all of the sudden got BUSY! How that happened after all of troys therapy got cancelled, no idea.  To make a long story short, insurance only covers a certain amount of visits per therapy. For us we were lucky enough to get 30 visits combined PT and OT and 30 visits total for speech. Well, turns out those go quick when your going twice a week. Thankfully, Troy has been doing awesome physically so the need for PT isn't there anymore. What we really need is OT. With only having 4 sessions left were trying to use them wisely. Troys neuro pysch test is next week already! After that we will get a better understanding for what Troy still needs therapy wise. So, were going to hold off on therapy until we know the results. Fingers crossed (for Troy) we can get OT to do an on site job training with him to see what his job all entails.  Our big news this week is that Troy got the big stamp of approval to get behind a wheel again. Um... I&