Updates
The day finally came that we got to meet with Dr Vandenberg again. I was a good mix of excited and totally annoyed. Troy has this thing where he thinks I'm out to ruin his life because I tell the doctors the truth... Yeah, its been a lot of fun dealing with him the last couple weeks. In fact, on our ride to the appointment he told me he didn't want me there.
That made me feel just dandy.
I had asked him to collect some papers from work that had weekly updates from the people he has been working with. When he got home he said, "I read them and I'm not taking them in." I asked if he thought that was being honest and he just stared at me. Obviously he knows better but he doesn't want anything in his way no matter what that means for his healing. That is by far the most frustrating part of all of this for me. I don't feel like he cares; I get he just wants to be normal but at some point he has to figure it out and get used to it because there is literally nothing else he or I can do about it. It is what it is. I often remind him that this is his new normal and as soon as he finds a way to deal with this new normal, the better life will be for him.
When we talked with the doctor yesterday we got all our questions answered which is a first. He is a busy guy and typically doesn't have much time to sit and talk. It is nice to get things cleared up. Especially when I'm telling Troy he can't do something and he thinks I'm being ridiculous and making these decisions for myself. Lets be real, he isn't the only one that thinks I'm being crazy about Troy's new rules. One of the biggest questions we got cleared up is farm work. From the doctors mouth; "He cannot do any farm work, he will get there but he is not there yet." Honestly it took a lot for me to not sit there and be like. TOLD YA! I know that won't help anything...
Troy is his own worst enemy. When he can't do something or is told he shouldn't be doing something; angry Troy comes out and he gets mean. He will literally say and do whatever he has to, to get his way. In a way he has become a bit manipulative. That drives me completely crazy. I want to trust him but I know he will say whatever he thinks he has to. Then, I have to try and use my head to make the better decision which usually ends up in Troy not being happy.
He is up to eight hours a day. The doctor thought that the problems that are occurring at six hour will more than likely carry over to eight hours. He just wants Troy to succeed and not to push the limits at work. The more he pushes it at work the more he can't be reliable and we don't want that. As far as his golf addiction; he can push it with things like that to try and build his endurance. Troy just needs to learn his limits and what is too much.
Another new thing were going to try is putting him on Ritalin. The most repetitive thing we see in his reviews are that he misses things and doesn't complete tasks fully. This is when he gets frustrated and then all his work goes downhill because he is so upset. Were hoping that with this low dose of Ritalin he can prioritize and organize things more efficiently. Making things a little easier at work. Today is his first day with the med so I'm very excited to see how it goes.
We won't be making any changes and rules are 'as is' until next appointment, August 10. We have learned that those appointments come quicker than we think. I even made sure to have Dr Vandenberg tell Troy that I cannot call into the office for a boost in hours. Thank you, thank you! That will make my life a heck of a lot easier and Troy can't be on my case about "not caring" or whatever else he comes up with.
After we got in the car after the appointment Troy said, "you weren't as bad as I thought you were going to be.." ............Seriously?! Oh my word, I need a vacation, all by myself!
I'm hoping this habit breaks because we go through this same ole stupid cycle every time before appointments. Its getting old, quickly.
That made me feel just dandy.
I had asked him to collect some papers from work that had weekly updates from the people he has been working with. When he got home he said, "I read them and I'm not taking them in." I asked if he thought that was being honest and he just stared at me. Obviously he knows better but he doesn't want anything in his way no matter what that means for his healing. That is by far the most frustrating part of all of this for me. I don't feel like he cares; I get he just wants to be normal but at some point he has to figure it out and get used to it because there is literally nothing else he or I can do about it. It is what it is. I often remind him that this is his new normal and as soon as he finds a way to deal with this new normal, the better life will be for him.
When we talked with the doctor yesterday we got all our questions answered which is a first. He is a busy guy and typically doesn't have much time to sit and talk. It is nice to get things cleared up. Especially when I'm telling Troy he can't do something and he thinks I'm being ridiculous and making these decisions for myself. Lets be real, he isn't the only one that thinks I'm being crazy about Troy's new rules. One of the biggest questions we got cleared up is farm work. From the doctors mouth; "He cannot do any farm work, he will get there but he is not there yet." Honestly it took a lot for me to not sit there and be like. TOLD YA! I know that won't help anything...
Troy is his own worst enemy. When he can't do something or is told he shouldn't be doing something; angry Troy comes out and he gets mean. He will literally say and do whatever he has to, to get his way. In a way he has become a bit manipulative. That drives me completely crazy. I want to trust him but I know he will say whatever he thinks he has to. Then, I have to try and use my head to make the better decision which usually ends up in Troy not being happy.
He is up to eight hours a day. The doctor thought that the problems that are occurring at six hour will more than likely carry over to eight hours. He just wants Troy to succeed and not to push the limits at work. The more he pushes it at work the more he can't be reliable and we don't want that. As far as his golf addiction; he can push it with things like that to try and build his endurance. Troy just needs to learn his limits and what is too much.
Another new thing were going to try is putting him on Ritalin. The most repetitive thing we see in his reviews are that he misses things and doesn't complete tasks fully. This is when he gets frustrated and then all his work goes downhill because he is so upset. Were hoping that with this low dose of Ritalin he can prioritize and organize things more efficiently. Making things a little easier at work. Today is his first day with the med so I'm very excited to see how it goes.
We won't be making any changes and rules are 'as is' until next appointment, August 10. We have learned that those appointments come quicker than we think. I even made sure to have Dr Vandenberg tell Troy that I cannot call into the office for a boost in hours. Thank you, thank you! That will make my life a heck of a lot easier and Troy can't be on my case about "not caring" or whatever else he comes up with.
After we got in the car after the appointment Troy said, "you weren't as bad as I thought you were going to be.." ............Seriously?! Oh my word, I need a vacation, all by myself!
I'm hoping this habit breaks because we go through this same ole stupid cycle every time before appointments. Its getting old, quickly.
It's a new day tomorrow and we will start fresh. Story of our lives!
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